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only read this if you're really bored...

August 31, 2004

This is apparently what the chad wrote in a notepad on his phone after he had finished texting me for the evening. It's quite hard to follow, but if you work hard it sucks you into his drug psychosis quite well!

"No ones spiked my drink i did this man made earth grwn desaster theyll find this months lter as the las text ever sent bullshit i never sent it theres people all around me light in the corner of my eyes my body shiverin slowerbut faster the music then comes to a beat then speads thensettles in the middle my legs bouncing like a needle on a vibtrsting pad drugs are bad the lights are bleeding or like rain down i window all the noise re gting confusedd people dissapearing im yawning im with fergielaylas on my lap shes stroking me theprtsn talkin dwn mu ear is in fact +bout te metres away i should right a fucking book radio1 just scarws the shit our if me my phone is nie stomach i have a keyboard thers pnly two girls but i here nine the lights warm me warn me people run or do i imagine im in speke 2004 august 23,i think im on the floor yetim siitting yo p i heee everyone conversation i see shadow are they reel or di i imagineit moves to quickly im sitting down it ioo fasr i need a piss andaonother can ofred bullth toiletis my solitude noting moves ot ssks me questions the tolet rolls make a queation mark im paranoid i helped my self and left the right money everyone know hwt noone sees me in the middl im welsh im chad valley thetents now full of chavs and there hos lots of shakingheads how am i gfetting home 6 hoursxc+caers ad cand cans look like theyveben herefor years orhit,by aholcaust or 9/11 this is fucking wied i ma lone in thisdremsyate my facefeels like im knawering on my bra+n and dont caeebefore i waslike my back achesbut my facre is tingling so utdosnt matter which made me ask about the nevus syste he didnt answer midgets everywhere lonely chairs are they minea car moves slightly im off bifg drum and bass im contrllin my self on my ow keyboard drugs aee quick chemical drotherds are quickersmoke heat no soace i love it im trapped in technology oall consuminfgpwpeoloe out of the smke massive footballs peesinal c+arpark in out you get everywhere i am spunkflying f=throufh the solar system they know what im writing they know wht im thinking theyere sitting on my shoulser thery cant theve gonein front shadoes i rly on deny and defy me make ne giggle oncemoreill laugh promice in a search office ic an see aganyetmy hands and my brain aret coordinintin im working un haldfsyet i cant catch up ill have to write slow like adad with a newcomputerthe room idbrates 80s new yorkerswlk in wolves i feel like a lion the radioator doesnt work there all southeren cats always win how can i wake in the morningthe worldscavings in new breed of englishman more look like chickens i am slowly sobering thank god slow movement doesnt leave risidual matter anymore everyones talking no mouth movement buttherereall saying ormskirk did i make them im really thirstyi want to open a new bottle of pepsi but mine doesnt seem to want to go down im gulpin and gulong but the bottle never ends."

More mp3s on Thursday...

 Posted by Chris at 05:12 PM |  Category: Spaz

this isn't written in any language in particular

August 29, 2004

Chad texted me a few times last night, here's the transcripts exactly as i recieved them - lack of punctuation, spelling mistakes and all.

text 1 - 21:21
right im back stage at creamfields and its really wierd i feel like fox mulder infiltrating a top secret military base theres lots of music im just walking around and im like the only one not in uniform and people are running and theres army trucks and some guy just gave me a mushroom for a cigarette my AAA pass works on some people but not others its wierd the mushrooms kicking in peace out bra. p.s. i met some clarts last night

text 2 - 22:43
I cant see my keyboard any more the lighs are like rain ciming down a window im laughing right now everyones staring im cold my dick's shrunk i cant feel my muscles in my body its all silent then paranoid the music then safty everybody knows everybody i see lookslike somebidy i know god made man in hisown image and every persin in the world i creatwd the random people i see are looking like people i know because i creatws them if your listening to radio 1

text 3 - 22:48
Then im sitting to the right a little of stage with a vcan of red bull people keep appearing and dissapearing im scared im laughing cos im scared its no reason to laugh everyone knows im gonna get shot my face feels like its gonna implode cos of the rythem in myteeth is gre+ater than the music tell davehe gave me wrong tel layla i love her chris you can have my song books when they find a body the shuttles taking off now ggoodnighnt ladies adn germs peace

text 4 - 00:08
Im floatin higher i feel like im watching everyon in theworld from above i can see yoy hiya wheres layla there she is hi layla i wish she were besie me areyou laughing asmuch asi am and not gettig watchedby everyone for laughing andfeelin guilty can you pik me up pleadse


I do hope he's ok.

 Posted by Chris at 06:08 PM |  Category: Spaz

you're looking fierce

August 27, 2004

I’ve just found a page on one of my old webpages which kinda shocked me. I’ve been used to telling people that my old band kjell have had 9 albums and loads of songs, but it wasn’t until I looked at our back catalogue in full that I realised 114 songs is actually QUITE A LOT!
Go here to view the tracklistings of every Kjell album (many of which are now sadly lost forever) courtesy of Chad.

Ooh – 28 costumes are playing in London!
--Thursday 2 September 2004 --
THE NOISETTES + RATATAT + 28 COSTUMES
@ THE METRO, London
8pm until 3am, £6 / £5 with flyer

Searching for Nadia Ksaiba stuff on the web found this funny woman writing about the funny east berlin electro scene.

razorlight are playing nme's rock and roll riot tour. good job it's not called the new rock revolution tour or we'd have to start calling good old johnny a hypocrite.

A couple of weeks ago mrs. swish declared an interest to go to ‘the cock’ – I managed to shy her away from the idea telling stories about a disgustingly dirty dancefloor and poor sound quality. Now there’s no need with Fierce Girl blowing up all over the country – they look likely to become the gay Mike Skinner thingywotsit.
The vid for their [somewhat repetitive] single ‘double drop’ is here.
there is a really really funny moment in it, about halfway through - it flys in the face of the whole hard council estate gayboy look they’ve got going and kinda proves the VERy VERY CAMP gayboy theory – one of the boys jumps to head a footy that his mate has passed to him, and not only completely misses the ball, but also leaps like a jumping bean with his hands at his side – you have to see it I suppose.

 Posted by Chris at 11:56 AM |  Category: Life, Video

ymss & The sellout flaw

August 26, 2004



Youthmovie Soundtrack Strategies – A Little Late he Staggered Through the Door and Into her Eyes
A lot of clever words have been written about ymss, most of them on the front of their new cd, which is labelled “Hurrah! Another year, surely this one will be better than the last; the inexorable march of progress will lead us all to happiness”.
They are the most unpredictable bastards on the planet. Listening to them is like a lucky dip at a school fete, except with tarantulas and electric eels alongside the usual toy cars and chocolate bars. Mogwai-esque serenity draws you in, relaxes, soothes and virtually massages, and then some fucker puts on ‘Ace of Spades’ by Motorhead - painfully refreshing and dry, like a big poo when you’re really dehydrated, or snorting a line of Gordon’s.
Website: http://www.ymss.org.uk
Buy it on Amazon


The Sellout Flaw – Mighty More Fun Dedicators
Ormskirk/burscough superstar cider drinkers The ‘Flaw have a bit of a reputation in my old hometown for being shit. They are highly misunderstood, and perhaps a little out of their time. Being as punk as good charlotte is considered a great thing, being as punk as billy bragg in sid vicious clothes with stupid pointless self-obsessed Ramones lyrics is not a good thing; in the eyes of the ruling class, 16 year old girls. Personally I think they rock some seriously hard greatness. Treading the line between blatent sex pistols wanabees and don’t-give-a-fuck teenagers with more cool than is generally allowed.
Website: http://www.theselloutflaw.com/

 Posted by Chris at 01:56 PM |  Category: Audio

paula crying

August 23, 2004

Seeing paula radcliffe break down whilst being interviewed on the bbc was pretty sad, sure she didn’t do too well in the marathon because it was hot, and she had been training for years for that day, and yes many people in Britain hoped she would win, but she’s gone a bit overboard.
the whole nature of competition means that sometimes you wont win (or finish), and every competitor knows that and is prepared for that. She’s out there crying the next day on national telly.



Pull yourself together girl, it’s only running; it’s not as if its football. Now that would be worth crying over.

I’m probably going to trash tonight with mrs swish; bloc party are playing and I’ve never been before so I’m quite excited. It’s a bit weird because now I’ve been offered tickets for two bloc party gigs in the past two days, the other being in Liverpool next month. Apparently my brother knows a girl, who is going out with the guitarist in Agent Blue, who are touring with the ‘party, who were in ‘My Dog Skip’ with Kevin Bacon.

 Posted by Chris at 05:58 PM |  Category: Spaz

the decision made...

August 19, 2004

Finally a review of The Ordinary Boys which matches my views on the young chappies perfectly, thus relieving me the task of constructing a spiteful diatribe in my own words.

Read it here on 75orless.com

I've decided that i'm definitely gonna make this into an mp3 blog from now on, all i need is about 50 to 100 megs of webspace to hold the mp3s for a week or so at a time, so if anyone can point me in the right direction i'd be well chuffed.

finally got around to listening to the annie album sampler today; it's top. buy it (or maybe download a song from it on this site next week!).

 Posted by Chris at 04:43 PM |  Category: Reviews, Spaz

the dead 60s

August 03, 2004

Yeah ok, i am occasionally hypocritical when it comes to music opinion - but i have a lot of opinions and it's fucking hard not to contradict yourself once in a while.
continuing on this theme i would like to proclaim my love for 'The Dead 60s' a (kinda) ska band from Liverpool, signed to Deltasonic and not very cosmicmerseyshroomadelic; i have never said I hate ska music but there is a distinct possibility that I will in the future, hence the disclaimer above.

Watch their video for 'You're Not The Law'
Read Scrapie's Interview

 Posted by Chris at 12:34 PM |  Category: Video

wierd kids

August 02, 2004

This week a number of things have been brought to my attention. One is that full time sitting down work is awesome! I don’t have to walk anywhere or carry anything, and I can listen to music and loads of other cool shit like that. The other thing is that kids and early teenagers are really, really, really scary. If Jennifer Garner really was ‘13 going on 30’ then she would spend all day thinking about Busted, or Harry from McFly, or Duncan from Blue. Perhaps she would spend a couple of hours writing a poem to send into TOTP magazine as Amber Rose from Grimsby did:
The coolest girls and the saddest boys
We’re the coolest girls,
You’re the saddest boys.
The coolest girls are Mary-Kate and Ashley,
The saddest boys are Elton John and John Travolta.
We’re the coolest girls ever to be known,
You’re the saddest boys in the whole known universe.
Maybe she would send an email to a chart show, under the name of ‘Crazed Charlie Fan’ asking if she could shave off Charlie Busted’s eyebrows and get the hairs implanted into her face so she looks like him?

 Posted by Chris at 01:14 PM |  Category: Spaz

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